Have you heard about this viral “dating spreadsheet” trend?
It stems from this TikTok from 2 years ago, showing a data-driven approach to the creator’s dating life.
She tracked all of her dates in a spreadsheet, and created pie charts, graphs, and curves to elucidate where she was having the most success and which factors were the best indicators of getting multiple dates.
The idea of a “dating spreadsheet” is making waves again right now — this PureWow article makes a case for keeping your very own spreadsheet.
But will I be getting on the dating spreadsheet trend?
To be clear — I am all for tracking your dates!
I believe in noting the basics — what you did (so you can figure out what the best first date formula is for you), what you wore (so you don’t re-wear the same outfit), which app you met on (so you can see which app tends to be best for you).
But to go deeper than that, I also believe in:
- making notes before your date about what impressions you have of someone based on their profile
- interrogating your own emotions heading into the date
- reflecting on what made you feel good, and what reservations still remain, after the date
Basically, I’m a proponent of the most mindful approach to tracking your dates.
The Downside of A Dating Spreadsheet
The TikTok trend tracks more things like height, occupation, and “survival rate” (the drop off rate after each date).
Trying to game the system by finding a correlation between height and number of dates? No!! All that’s really telling you is that the majority of men say they’re 5’10”, and that a lot of people lie about their height 😉
What’s Better Than A Dating Spreadsheet?
The best approach to tracking your dates isn’t through quantifying numbers on a spreadsheet — it’s through journaling about your emotions, and thoughtfully noticing your patterns and affinities over time.
Of course, the word “journaling” makes me want to run screaming in the other direction, towards my never-ending to-do lists and responsibilities. I don’t have time to journal! Also, a blank page is scary!
That’s why I made the SMP Dating Diary.
No more blank page / I don’t have time / I don’t know what to say fear.
The Dating Diary has you simply fill in the blanks on directed prompts about your dating life, painting a holistic view of who you are as a dater in no time at all.
Instead of an impersonal spreadsheet, the Dating Diary tracks your dates through Date Debrief pages. All your dates are in one place, and all your feelings about those dates fit neatly onto a page per date.
In my years of dating and date coaching, I’ve never found a better way to understand what someone’s dating tendencies are and what type of person they are *actually* looking for on a dating app.
The 30-page Dating Diary is part of Profile In An Hour (so it also comes with a whole boatload of other worksheets and resources to help you become a true dating app authority).
Ditch the dating spreadsheets — be a mindful dater instead!