Hey Everyone,

Congrats! You’ve matched with someone on a dating app. You’ve started a conversation (need help with an opening line? Check out this post from a few weeks ago). Now what?

Well, after much experience myself and with my clients, I’ve come up with some things to think about to get your message read and, hopefully, replied to:

1. Focus on quality, not quantity. Don’t message with too many people at once. Message with just a few so you can focus on making good conversation with each person.

2. Compliment common interests and personality, not looks. People want to know that you’re reaching out for more than just how they look. That can come later.

3. Stake out common ground, be positive, and focus on the person’s unique qualities.

4. Ask questions. And keep asking! This is a great way to get a conversation going—and keep it going—and to learn about someone.

5. Keep it short and simple. Don’t get into long texts right away. You don’t need to go into great detail when telling a story or something about yourself. Not until you’ve messaged for a while.

6. Re-read what you wrote before you hit send. Make sure your message makes sense and check for spelling, grammar, and typos.

7. Be yourself! Finally, and most importantly, be true to who you are. Show your true colors so that you wind up going out with matches who genuinely like you for you!

Need help with your online dating profile? Schedule a consultation to learn more.

And if you’re a previous SMP client, click here to find out about date coaching!