The Anti-Dear Diary

Hey Everyone,

You know your fantasy version of life, where each night, you sit at your bedside and thoughtfully write down your hopes and dreams? A candle gently flickers nearby and perhaps a perfectly askew cashmere throw covers your feet? Yeah, that was never me either.

At various points in my life, I’d tried to journal, but my words always sounded unnatural, like a “Dear Diary” moment. However, post-divorce I decided to give it another go. One day, I grabbed one of my daughters’ half-used school composition books and began to write. Even though, or maybe because, I wasn’t someone who’d kept a journal my whole life, I felt empowered by it. I soon found that journaling wasn’t merely a way to vent horrible thoughts about my divorce and daydream about meeting my possible soul mate but also an adjunct to therapy.

The process should give you comfort, not anxiety, so start simple. Write one sentence a day. Or even one word. I began by writing thoughts out in list form, to ease the pressure of the Dear Diary moment. Try free writing, where you write without concern for perfect punctuation or correct grammar. No one else will be reading this. I give you permission to make mistakes and cross out words or sentences. Overthinking your journaling makes it unenjoyable. Make it as lighthearted as you can.

And who knows? Maybe one day those words will turn into a book! I never dreamed that mine would, but now The Art of Online Dating will be in bookstores in one month (crazy!). You can still pre-order your copy (which comes with a free download of my Mindful Dating 101 course) here!

Happy writing (and, of course, dating!),

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