Wanna know the biggest secret to successful dating?? Ask lots of questions! I went on 100s of dates, and what I noticed was this:
I left feeling the best when I felt we were both equally interested in what the other person’s story was. And you get that by asking tons of questions. Who doesn’t like talking about themselves?! Ask and keep asking. Don’t stick to broad strokes questions; get into the nitty gritty interesting stuff by asking follow ups and clarifications.
Make sure you’re paying attention to the whether you’ve done most of the talking—if that’s the case, turn the conversation to focus on them for a while. It’s a give and take. Make sure the reverse doesn’t happen either. One of the biggest complaints I hear from my female clients is: “He talked about himself the whole time.” Ugh! No matter how charming your date was and no matter the gender, if the person isn’t asking enough about you, they won’t be someone who’ll make you feel supported and special in the long run.
So after a date, don’t forget to ask yourself the question: were there lots of questions? If yes, they might be a keeper 🙂
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